Saturday, April 18, 2009

Stuck in an airport and feeling chatty...

Here I am...sitting in the floor of the Charlotte Airport with tears streaming down my face. Not the most private place to let loose of one's emotion, but sometimes it happens that way...catches you off guard and you just have to go with it. I am going with it...

It's finally my spring break. I never thought this week would get here. This past week was one filled with stress as we had our state testing. These tests are supposed to measure the student's achievement and determine if THEY have made appropriate academic growth...which is all well and good, but what they tend to use these tests for is to determine whether or not the TEACHER has taught the material well enough for EVERY child - no matter their level of ability - to learn exactly the same thing. Crazy I think...but that's just my humble opinion.

All that to say, I think I am a little raw...very ready for a vacation. No, I am not headed to some tropical paradise. THat would require a bathing suit which would only lead to more stress! I am headed to the midwest. Who gets this excited about going to Missouri and Nebraska??? ME!!!! I am traveling to visit my dearest friend, Kristi. We were roomies in college...and she loves me anyway! :) Then, I am making a bit of a drive to visit my brother and sister in law. I am blessed with the very best as sister in laws go. We often joke that if she and Tom were to ever divorce...we'd keep her and divorce him! Just kidding, Tom...sort of!

So if I am so excited, why am I crying? Dang magazine article! I love a good magazine. You know sometimes you just don't have the time to get into a book, but a magazine, on the other hand, can fill those moments when you just need to read a little something. So I sat here reading the May issue of G**d Housekeeping...watching people run by rushing to their gate. Apparently, they don't have the leisure I was "afforded" in a 3 hour layover. (to be read with a sarcastic undertone) The very last page has an artical by Nia Vardal*s who is apparently a movie star...didn't know that. (she's in the new movie, "My L1fe in Ru1ns) She is an adoptive mother. The article speaks to the way that adoptive children somehow come to resemble their parents. I've seen it! It's amazing. They mimic their accent, their mannerisms, even their looks. How I pray for Emma on that one!!! It's this paragragh that got me...

"I tried all the conventional routes to parenthood,
and waited a long time to meet my daughter.
But if there's one thing I learned,
it's that every moment was
bringing me closer to being exactly
who I was supposed to be - this little girl's mother."

That's what got me. I know I am in the process of becoming...I will be until the day I die. I am continually working on becoming the woman God created me and desires me to be, but at the same time, I realized, I am also working on becoming Emma's Momma. I will lose my name...I will no longer be "Angie." I will, after she arrives, become known as Emma's Momma. I'm looking forward to that!

1 comment:

Kim said...

Hey Emma's Momma! That was a very touching post. Hope you are having a great trip. God Bless!