Monday, December 28, 2009

So Disappointing

For those of you who are not in the China adoption realm...it's not pretty.  There are several things right now that are discouraging. 

First, apparently an American adoptive father sexually abused his daughter who was adopted from China.  China is taking this quite seriously and is suspending operation with that agency as well as the social worker who completed their homestudy.  You can read more about this here...

Then, this months referrals are beginning to arrive.  It's a dissappointingly small batch.

In 2005, nearly 12,000 children were adopted from China.
In 2009, the number has dropped to less than 2,000.
Unbelievable.  At this rate, the numbers suggest that it could take 15-20 years to get through the backlog of dossiers.  15-20 years.  Really? 

Iv'e been feeling unsettled about adopting a child with special needs, but at this rate, it seems as if that may be my only option if I truly want a child.  I'm praying for guidance...

7 comments:

Cindy said...

Crazy morning over here but I will be in touch soon! I have some ideas... :) xoxo

The Raudenbush Family said...

Keep praying - He hears the cry of your heart and will answer your prayers.
Hugs,
Kelly

tiffany said...

Oh ugh. This makes me angry. Is China so unaware of the abuse that happens right there in their own institutions? One case in all the thousands of adoptions...

Well, I try to be careful what I say on public forums because I realize they can take offense to anything at all. But just ugh. If they want to close, they should just close instead of coming up with these fake excuses.

We got three children home from China in three and a half years! That is what used to be possible.

On another note, special needs vary greatly and what is a sn in China is often not one here. I would say our son (our only child adopted through the sn program) is completely healthy. In China he would have required major surgery. Here it was a day procedure and has never required more than a check up after that. His file looked scary, that is true. But we read it carefully, read between the lines, and believed he was ok. And he is.

I tell all this to try to offer encouragement. I hope all of this makes sense someday when you meet YOUR child.

Good thoughts your way.

amazeingteacher said...

i know how hard this decision is, i'm praying for you.

Susan said...

I have swiped this from Lisa L. who got it from Amy..
It belongs here tonight.
--------
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the land
there are parentless children, with no toys in hand

No stockings to be hung by the chimney with care
no hopes for a family soon to be there

Their beds are not snug--but cold and quite bare
there are no goodnight kisses--no one to care

While we in our homes, laughing in delight
all settle down for a Merry Chistmas Eve night

When in someone's heart--there arises a clatter
there are children in need--who's lives really DO matter!

Away to the computer please go in a flash
to see the sweet face with whom YOU could be matched!

While a child you see--their beautiful face all aglow
could this be MY child--could I already know??

When in the dreams of the orphan--what always appears
is a family to love them, to care and hold dear

As you stare at that child--your heart beats real quick--
for you know in your heart that sweet face will stick

More dreams sweet children have--to call parents by name-
come mama! come daddy! come family to claim!

To the ends of the earth--your heart seems to call
now child--I'm coming--I wish for you ALL!

So on a plane to your child--over rooftops you flew
to hold this dear soul--a wish did come true

And then in a twinkling-I saw through the door
this child of my heart-that was waiting no more

As I got my camera and was turning around-
into my arms did he come with a bound!

He was dressed in many layers from his head to his foot
and into my heart his life was just put

there was no round face--no plump little belly
just sad little eyes, and legs shaking like jelly

In a swirl of a pen, and a stamp and a seal
my world became brighter--like I could suddenly feel!

We spoke not a word--they weren't needed at all
and I knew in this moment where I got this call

God layed his hands on my heart--and to the occasion I rose
and He could do it for you--this question He'll pose.....

It won't be a shout--no not even a whistle
it won't be real clear--but faint like a whisper

Can you make room in your heart--if you try with your might?
And make a difference for one--help them see the light?

I can see you exclaim as you hold your child tight--
Thank you Lord for this gift--you got it EXACTLY right!

Steve and Kristen said...

We've not met, but I've been reading your blog for a while now. Don't discount the SN or WC program. Many children are labled SN in China but truly have no real issues. Pray. I couldn't endure the wait either.

Wuxi Mommy said...

I've been following your blog for a long while now, and I feel your pain. We were in the NSN program over 2 years before we took the leap to the SN program. The decision was a very difficult one, and one that we didn't take lightly. Our daughter, Maia, was 3 when we brought her home in March 09. Even in spite of some significant medical issues, she's been thriving and doing extraordinarily well. I'll be honest and share that adopting an older child does come with it's own set of challenges, and I would encourage you to read a bit about that before making your decision. However, looking back, I can't imagine if we hadn't been matched to our girl. She's absolutely the perfect fit for our family, and truly hand-picked by God to complete us! The 30 month wait was torture for me, too, and I'm praying that He soon opens up a door for you to find your Emma.